10 Facts Of Life That Embody What It Really Means To Be A Redhead

Apparently, only 1-2% of the human population has red hair. That being said, there aren't too many people who this will resonate with, but the ones that can relate have the satisfaction of being a part of one of the rarest genetic clubs in the world. Two members of said club happen to be my roommate and me. We put our fiery heads together and compiled this list of what it really means to be a redhead. So whether your hair falls darker on the red hair gradient, or you're technically considered "strawberry blonde," this one's for you.

1. The sun is basically always out to get you.

Or at least that's what it feels like. As soon as you step foot outside and that blazing ball of fire catches a glimpse of your pale skin, you're pretty much doomed before you can make it to your car. Let's put it this way; the sun makes it its mission to turn you into Patrick Star, and 10/10 times, it succeeds.

 

 

2. Even your freckles have freckles.

As soon as spring has sprung, so have the freckles. They'll pop up all over your body, even in places you didn't think the sun could reach. But since the sun is always out to get you, it's only fitting. If only there was a way to combat them...

3. Sunscreen, sunscreen, sunscreen.

If you have red hair, you're pale. If you're pale, sunscreen is your best friend. By that logic, sunscreen is every redhead's best friend. You may have "applied" it when you were little, but you've since realized, upon receiving sunburns galore, that actually applying it is super important. Your tan friends will never understand the art of lathering it on with no section of skin left un-sun-screened. In fact, they look at you like you have four heads at any mention of the word "reapply." To us redheads, sunscreen isn't just a precaution...it's necessary for us to maintain that white, snowy glow.

4. People are always asking you questions.

On the more tame side of the spectrum, "do your parents have red hair?" This is either followed by a simple "yes," or followed by a long explanation that begins with "no, it's a recessive gene..." Another one of my personal favorites is: "Does the carpet match the drapes?" For some reason, friends and strangers alike find this question to be the funniest, non-personal, and non-offensive question they could think to ask their carrot-top friend. Honestly, it makes us uncomfortable and although we may be chuckling along, our face is destined to turn the color of our hair. Most of us respond with, "no comment," but there is still always the chance that we'll answer you honestly. Which is worse? Your call.

5. Walking into a hair salon is like walking the red carpet.

Being a redhead can come with insecurities and low self-esteem at times. But when you walk into a hair salon, all of those insecurities melt away because you're basically a celebrity. Every single time without fail, you receive a compliment from a hairdresser or even a customer. You're a middle-aged woman magnet! They all want your color and all leave you with the same tidbit of advice: "Never dye it. You can't get that from a bottle!!!"

6. You were convinced that you were any cartoon character with red hair while you were growing up.

For girls, you were usually Blossom from "Power Puff Girls," Kim Possible, Sam from "Totally Spies," Ariel from "The Little Mermaid," and essentially any other character with red hair like yours. For guys, it was usually either Dexter from "Dexter's Laboratory," or Chuckie from "Rugrats." As a kid, most of your "we're not best friends anymore" fights stemmed from your non-redheaded friends claiming to be one of these characters in a harmless, made-up game.

7. You're easy to spot in a crowd.

When people are looking for you, the red hair is what they search for. No matter where you go, if there's a crowd, you're the one that can't go by unnoticed. This same fact also hurt your chances of winning rounds of Hide N' Seek as a kid. And although it does kind of squash your dreams of becoming an undercover secret agent, you won't let that get you down.

8. Your cover is blown if you forget to clean your hair out of the drain.

Showers often leave traces of your vibrant hair, making it quite obvious whose it is. It's hard to shift the blame for something that is so blatantly obvious. "I'm really sorry, I forgot again! But you have to admit that it really does complement the color of the shower tiles nicely."

9. You've [somewhat] accepted that you've been discriminated by the emoji makers.

While there used to be a redheaded emoji, it's since been discarded with the latest iPhone update. So really you're lying any time you send an emoji with any other color hair. You're only half joking when you say you want to send a strongly worded letter to the emoji makers and ask for a redheaded addition to the emoji gang... but you're not bitter.

10. Finally, the "ginger" comments.

According to urbandictionary.com, "Gingers" are generally considered to be inferior to their more melanin-rich brethren, and thus deservingly discriminated against. Gingers are thought to have no souls. The condition, 'gingervitis' is genetic and incurable." Isn't that nice?

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© 2021 by Alison Gips.